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Funny Valentine's Day Quotes

Mukta Gaikwad Jan 31, 2024
Nothing is more blissful than falling in love and breathing every moment of your life with that special someone. Here are some funny Valentine's Day quotes that are bound to inspire you, as you reach out to your beloved one.
Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017
Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.
― Richard Jeni

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Calvin: What's it like to fall in love?
Hobbes: Well... say the object of your affection walks by...
Calvin: Yeah?
Hobbes: First, your heart falls into your stomach and splashes your innards. All the moisture makes you sweat profusely. This condensation shorts the circuits to your brain and you get all woozy. When your brain burns out altogether, your mouth disengages and you babble like a cretin until she leaves.
Calvin: That's LOVE?!?
Hobbes: Medically speaking.
Calvin: Heck, that happened to me once, but I figured it was cooties!!

Funny Valentine's Day Quotes

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Valentine's Day is when a lot of married men are reminded what a poor shot Cupid really is. ― Unknown

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I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's Day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV. ― Tracy Smith
Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day! Jay Leno
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. ― Charles M. Schulz
No matter how love-sick a woman is, she shouldn't take the first pill that comes along. ― Joyce Brothers
Anyone can be passionate but it takes real lovers to be silly. — Rose Franken
Give me a thousand kisses, then a hundred, then a thousand more. ― Catullus

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True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. ― Erich Segal
Falling in love is so hard on the knees. — Aerosmith
If I tell you I love you, can I have you forever? ― Casper

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Love is a leap ... I was never inspired to jump. ― Kate & Leopold
One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry - Oscar Wilde

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The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more; that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. ― Notebook
Remember my sentimental friend, you will be judged not by how much you love, but by how much you are loved. ― Wizard of Oz
I'm dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it.” — Garry Shandling
Look, I guarantee there'll be tough times. I guarantee that at some point, one or both of us is gonna want to get out of this thing. But I also guarantee that if I don't ask you to be mine, I'll regret it for the rest of my life, because I know, in my heart, you're the only one for me. ― Runaway Bride
Some people are settling down, some people are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies. ― Sex and the City
Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017
Love is a serious mental disease. Plato
Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night. ― Woody Allen

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Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free till they find someone just as wild to run with them. ― Sex and the City
I never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude. ― Henry David Thoreau

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By persistently remaining single, a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation. ― Oscar Wilde
If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you've made me smile, the entire evening sky would be in the palm of my hand. ― Unknown
Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017
Love is like playing the piano. First you must learn to play by the rules, then you must forget the rules and play from your heart. ― Unknown

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You don't marry someone you can live with - you marry the person who you cannot live without. ― Unknown
True love is like ghosts, which everybody talks about and few have seen. ― Francois Duc de La Rochefoucauld
Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017
Better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all. ― St. Augustine
Love cures people - both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it. ― Dr. Karl Menninger
Some love lasts a lifetime. True love lasts forever. ― Unknown
If the instinctive attraction has lasted for far too long, today is the day to do something about it. The picture may seem fuzzy, but it's never going to get clear if you don't want it to. So, buckle up, and put all the motivation into action!